


Just This One Thing

by NohrianScum (OrderOfRevan)



Series: Noscu's Corriander Collection [3]
Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Bittersweet, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Pseudo-Incest, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2019-05-20 22:39:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14903468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OrderOfRevan/pseuds/NohrianScum
Summary: Corrin meets Xander during a night time walk.





	Just This One Thing

**Author's Note:**

> Marx is so fun to write.

Corrin walked amongst the ghostly shapes of the tents camped just beyond the land of Mokushu, knowing that it would be only a few more days until they reached Izumo and she could give her troops the rest they deserved. It had been a long month, sailing across open ocean, dueling pirates, and assisting Hoshidan Ninja in revenge plots against Nohrian-allied Ninjas who disgraced Nohr with its tactics. 

Since then, they’d fought off ambushes, engaged in battles against bandits, and talked about all the different things that would have to happen in order for them to make it to Shirasagi and seize the Ivory Throne. Azura had been sitting in on their war meetings, which Xander had insisted Corrin lead to demonstrate her rising ability as the commander of the invasion force. Still, he was always there at her elbow, constantly attentive, giving her advice and providing her with a sounding board in ways that the others couldn’t. 

She knew… Knew Leo and Camilla had seen horrible things, too, knew that Elise was aware of how bad Nohr was and how much she wanted to fix it, but… But Corrin had been thrust into the kind of position Xander always held without realizing it. Father fixated on her, his scrutinous eye on her every movement, and Xander’s guidance and experience kept her grounded, made her feel less… 

Alone. 

She half expected to find him training amongst the tents right now, swinging his sword through the night like he always had.  With all the bad orders they’d been given lately, she would even expect his movements to be furious, for him to lose some of his careful restraint, the control that permeated everything he did. She often found herself wondering, since his confession, if he ever talked about what he was going through with anyone but her, but… 

But the more time she spent around him, the more she realized he fulfilled very different roles to everyone around camp and that it might very well be that she was unique. 

“Are you up again?”

The voice -- deep, deliberate, familiar -- startled her. She spun around, hand on Yato’s hilt, though there was no real reason for it, relaxing only when she looked up into his face and found him staring down at her bemusedly. 

“Gods alive,” she breathed, walking forward and striking his chest lightly. “Announce your presence! You move so quietly when you’re not in your armor, that I didn’t hear you!” 

“I … I apologize,” he said, in spite of not looking very apologetic at all, reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder. “You look distracted. Corrin… What’s wrong?”

She never really expected him to be able to guess these things, but he somehow always did. Corrin has never failed to notice how he constantly caters to Elise’s needs, how he’s hyper aware of Camilla and Leo, and even though he’s not a man of many social graces he is a compassionate man where it counts. 

It’s even easy to tell, once you know him, once you could see how the furrow in his brow would deepen just so and his eyes would turn soft as he tilted his head towards one side. 

“So much has been happening, I feel like I can hardly breathe,” she admitted, then smiled, unable to stop the words before they left her mouth. “Looking for you, honestly. You know I can’t get enough of your company, Xander.” 

“Well, now that you have my attention…” he said with a throaty chuckle, “what do you intend to do with it, little princess?”

She felt herself flush, stepping up to him as she crossed her arms firmly over her chest. “I’m not that short, Xander,” she said, even knowing it was not true, especially compared to a man who towered over most  _ Nohrians _ , “you’re just a tree that grew into a man.”

He leaned forward, something in his eyes making the muscles in Corrin’s stomach clench, breath hitching as he reached up with the hand on her shoulder and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Xander seemed to be prone to say something, but he quickly shook his head and backed away, leaving her feeling very small indeed.

“Would you like to join me?” he asked. “It’s late, but… well, perhaps we can discuss what happens after this little detour into Izumo.”

She knew he wasn’t pleased with the detour, but at Elise’s excitement his face had softened just enough for him to relent, especially once Camilla joined in about how neglected her skin was after so much time in the ocean air. Still, it might be good to think about what was happening next, so she nodded, pushing lightly on his shoulder, his eyes glued to her fingertips as they traced down briefly down his bicep. 

“Okay,” she said, biting the inside of her lip to stop herself from thinking about the way his face looked obscured by his blonde curls, just so. “I guess I’m not sleeping anyway, so we might as well talk strategy… Though it will be odd without Azura.”

“I’ve studied the maps,” Xander said, his response coming more quickly than she would have expected, though he didn’t speak again as he lead her back to his tent… Among the largest, of course. 

She may be the Commander, but he was Crown Prince, a simple man still somehow arraigned in all the glories of royalty. 

They slipped inside, the glow stones illuminating the inside of the tent, the entire place smelling of ink and metal, of parchment and horse hair. It didn’t bother her at all, having spent her young life learning the blade and taking care of the stable duties, doing all the things a princess shouldn’t be doing and racing along with the boys. That was why she’d always looked up to Xander, who was staring at her right now, his arms hanging loosely at his sides, a look on his face that she couldn’t really read clearly. 

Of course, as close as they had become there were some things he didn’t even show her. 

She knew because of the things she and Camilla had been discussing in anticipation for her introduction to Court, because of the old rumors that stirred past Nyx’s lips whenever they were alone together. Stories of the Crown Prince doing things during the Concubine Wars that curled hair and chilled blood, though if he had done those things, Corrin had a very hard time imagining that they had not impacted him deeply. 

“May I ask you a question?” Xander asked, not moving from the place where he stood, the heat of his eyes on Corrin as she walked about the tent, fingers tracing the pieces on the war table. 

She nodded, looking back into his face, his gaze intense… More serious than she had seen him in a long time. Her stomach churned with worry and she took a step closer, worry chased away by something else when he reached out for her hand, running his calloused thumb over the back of her knuckles, peering at her from underneath his lashes. 

“What…” he began, swallowing hard enough that she could see it, a genuine hesitation that felt less like his usual thoughtful pauses. “What do you think of me?” 

“Xander--” she began, but he shook his head firmly, not releasing her hand. 

“Please, answer me.” 

Her stomach fluttered and she breathed out, cursing herself for all of her… All of her stupid flirting. This had to be because of that, had to lead to some kind of admonishment for how bold she had been, because there was no way… Even though his eyes had seemed to grow darker, even though he was clasping her hand like it was all that was keeping him standing… 

There was no way. 

He was far too responsible to _ ever  _ \-- 

“You’re amazing,” she managed, keeping her voice level against all odds. “I’ve always admired you. Everything I’ve ever known about the blade, I learned from you, and even now you continue to teach me all kinds of lessons.” 

Unable to meet his eyes, she bowed her head and continued on, “about how to lead, how to inspire loyalty in others, and how to be strong in the face of adversity. I see how brave you are and I…” 

She took a deep breath and steeled herself, looking up into Xander’s face, setting her jaw as she spoke, not expecting it to be so difficult to say even though it was technically the truth. “I was disappointed that we’re not really related. No matter how much you intimidated me, I wanted to be just like you and… And it was a blow to learn we don’t really have anything in common.”

She watched his eyes fall to her hand - her _ left  _ hand, she thought, throat constricting so tightly there was no way she could possibly speak, even if asked to. His tongue darted out and he licked his lips, the barest of smiles fluttering across his features as he gazed down into her face as he laughed breathily. 

“Good,” he said, “though I admit I… I’m not disappointed that we’re not truly related. Not in the slightest.” His eyes fell, as though he were unable to meet her gaze, and she realized that pink had slowly started to creep up his neck. Grip on her hand tightening, he took a step closer, his body heat making her breath hitch. “I mean that… I mean that in the best possible way, of course. Corrin --” 

He  _ breathed _ her name, other hand reaching out to cup her cheek, hand large and warm and so real that it made her anxiety spike in ways that she couldn’t wholly explain. 

Xander seemed to still himself, struggle displayed clearly on his handsome face for her to see, but whatever he was battling against lost as the hand not clasping hers traced slowly down her neck and he leaned forward. Bending his head towards her ear, so close that his lips could brush against it, he spoke in a voice that send shivers through her,  pitched in a way she had never heard before, though her body understood the tone perfectly. 

“I love you.” 

“Xander --” She started, hearing the waver in her own voice, her protested half-hearted… 

And he knew it. 

“No,” he said. “Corrin…” His hand slipped lower, resting on her waist. “Corrin… Listen to me. Please. I need to say … I need to say it.” 

His hand trembled, his eyes closed as though he couldn’t look at her, and she had never seen him like this… So vulnerable, so… He looked so young. Had he never looked so young? Even when he was a boy of fourteen and she was tearfully saying goodbye to him as Gunter took her to the place she’d spend the better part of two decades? 

“Xander,” she muttered, and this time her voice was soft, reaching up her free hand to brush his hair from his eyes, his circlet cold beneath her warm fingers. “Xander, this is a very… Very bad idea.”

“I know,” came the reply, his voice rough with emotion as his fingers curled into the fabric of her nightshirt, “but I love you. I know that… That it might not be enough.” His face was utterly red now, his eyes finally meeting hers with an intensity that sent warmth curling in her stomach and made her tongue feel heavy in her mouth, “I just need you to understand.” 

He was so sincere that it hurt, called to the part in her that wanted him to never feel lonely again. When he’d told her that she saw what few could, that she made him feel less lonely, she didn’t think she had fully understood, but here he was now… Practically begging her just to  _ acknowledge _ his feelings. Not to accept them, just to listen and to understand. That was all he was asking of her. 

Was she… Was she really the only one he had?

Did Xander spend so much time taking care of everyone else that he didn’t bother to rely on anyone?

The thought of him alone… 

Corrin found she couldn’t bear it. 

“I love you,” she breathed against his skin, the last syllable barely escaping her before he had crushed her against his body and pressed their mouths together, lips parted as though he could devour her words. 

It was all she could do just to hold on as he backed her against the wartable, mouth never leaving hers as his grip on her shifted, his arms wrapping around her securely. When he did break away, he looked dazed and a bit embarrassed, one of his hands reaching up as he ran his fingers through her hair, his hand trembling. 

“I’m…” he started, then shook his head. “Do you have any idea how… How long?” 

“No,” she admitted, “but are you sure? Are you sure this is a good idea?” 

She wanted to talk to him, to understand his reasoning, but most of all she wanted to be sure, to be sure she wasn’t dreaming and that this was real. 

That he was real. 

“No,” he said, firmly, the confidence seeping back into his voice. “I know this is a horrible idea, Corrin. If… If Father were to ever discover this…” Xander paused, the fingers on her waist flexing as he pushed on. “I know this violates countless rules, but Corrin…” He pressed his lips against her jaw, actions confident where his words faltered. “Corrin, I don’t care. I want to be with you. You are worth… Every risk.” 

Tears began to burn at the corners of her eyes and she swallowed thickly, unable to form words as she looked up into his face. Slowly, she reached up, moving her hands through his hair before pulling him down into a kiss, setting the pace herself this time… Gentle, always gentle. 

Corrin was afraid to ask for more. 

Afraid he’d disappear if she did. 

“Corrin,” he muttered against her lips, his hold on her shifting as his hands fell to her hips. “Corrin…” he said again, his voice thick with emotion and longing. “Please… Say something.”  

“Xander…” she managed, shivering, pressing her forehead against his. “I’m afraid but… But I’ve wanted this for so long. Please…”

His mouth fell open and he sucked in a breath, his body shuddering lightly underneath her touch as he reached up to move one of her hands from where it had tangled in his hair. Slowly, he dragged her by the wrist, placing her hand against his chest as he kissed her again, bending them both down as he nudged a leg between her thighs. 

“I love you,” he rasped, kissing her again, sucking her bottom lip between his teeth and gently nipping at it. “I’ve… Wanted to say it for so long,” Xander whispered against her mouth, one of his hands slipping lower, grasping her ass and pressing them close enough that her core rubbed against his leg every time she moved. 

“Xander!” she gasped, her head falling back, his lips chasing the column of her neck, teeth nipping at the skin there. 

“Your hair,” he said breathily, emphasising his point with a playful tug on her braid, “your skin…” 

Xander seemed to lose his trail of thought for a moment, intent on kissing her jaw, nipping at the lobes of her pointed ears, intently sucking a few marks onto her skin where he knew her clothing would hide it. All the while she pressed against him, quickly losing herself to the pressure building in her core with every shift against his body, gasping and sighing as she tried to grind herself against his thigh. 

“Your everything,” Xander groaned as he grasped her more tightly, rolling his hips into her movements, a thrill running through Corrin as she realized she could feel him growing hard against her. “It belongs to me now.” 

“Please!” Corrin gasped, not entirely sure what she was begging for at this point, knowing only that his words sent fire through her veins, that she needed him to touch her. “Xander… Xander…!”

Without preamble or warning, he picked her up effortlessly, forcing her to wrap her arms around his neck and legs around his center to avoid falling, looking up into his eyes to find him staring at her with a look that set her blood aflame for him. Pupils blown out, gaze full of so much desire that she could feel it radiate through her, the heat was only fueled by the look of pride and gentle affection somehow glinting in their depths. 

Effortlessly, he carried her across the room, lowering them both to his glorified futon, arms caging her beneath him. “It’s not what you deserve,” he said, placing a soft kiss to the point of one of her ears, “but it will have to do until I can make love to you properly.”

He laughed, the sound warm against her ear, a bit of the shyness from earlier returning to his face as his eyes shifted away from her ever so briefly, “Izumo will be good for something other than morale after all.” 

“I don’t care about where it is, Xander,” she managed, fingers finding his cravat as she dropped her legs onto the futon, her …. Her lover still between them. “It only matters that I have you.” 

Surprise flashed over his face, chased away by something else that she didn’t have time to properly assess before he was kissing her again, tugging her shirt out of her her trousers eagerly. She kissed him back, weaving her fingers into his hair and tugging his head closer, earning herself a groan as he opened his mouth wider, deepening their kiss with a tilt of his head. 

His cravat came undone with little effort, fingers flying to his buttons, eager to get him out of his clothing so that she could touch skin instead of fabric. Corrin wanted to touch him, wanted to know what he felt like, to trace the shape of each scar with her fingertips until she had memorized who he was, inside and out.

“Lift your arms,” he said, tugging her shirt off her head the moment she acquiesced, tossing it to the side, his eyes scanning her body as he looked down at her. 

Slowly, his palms traced over her, touching her shoulders, her sides, cupping her breasts through the fabric of her bra. His thumbs teased her nipples through the utilitarian black garment and she arched up into his palms earning herself a small laugh in response. Unable to be patient, Corrin propped herself up on one hand and slipped the straps off her shoulders just as he wrapped his arms around her to unhook the garment, satisfied when she felt the chill of air against her naked torso. 

“Beautiful,” Xander muttered as he lowered her back into the futon, his lips tracing her collarbone before he licked a path between her breasts. “Corrin… You’re so beautiful.” 

She shivered at the words, running her fingers over his lips as she looked into his face, feeling him press a kiss against their tips ever so gently. “So are you,” she managed, her throat tight. “Handsome, I mean. I… I’ve always thought you…”

He smiled, dipped his head forward, and silenced her by drawing one of her nipples between his lips and gently teasing it with his tongue. Fingers tangling in his hair, she pushed her chest into his mouth, a breathy moan leaving her lips. 

“Xander!” she managed, writhing underneath him, watching as he pulled away, sucking hard enough that it sent jolts down her body. 

Idly tracing the tip of his thumb over and around a nipple, Xander looked into her face with smouldering eyes, smiling as he pressed a kiss to her left breast. Corrin wanted him to do more, to touch her more, anywhere, whining as she pressed against his legs, trying to rub herself against him, arching her chest into his touch. Her lips pressing feverishly to his skin, she moved her hands to working it away from his body, wanting so badly to touch him that her fingers ached with the desire. 

He pulled away, though only for a moment, stripping his shirt off before he drew her into his arms, kissing her fully and fiercely. Groaning, she wrapped her arms around him in turn, blunt fingernails scratching down his back as he pushed her back onto the bed properly, pinning her to the mattress. 

“Corrin,” he moaned, voice rough. “I’ve wanted you… Wanted you for so long.” 

His teeth pinched the skin of her earlobe, hands snaking down her body as he unfastened the laces on her trousers and began to tug them off without preamble. Xander made quick work of her boots and trousers, tossing them away as he settled between her legs, running his hands up and down her thighs admiringly, making her face feel hotter than it ever had before. 

Even still, she couldn’t turn herself from the sight of him, his hair disheveled from her fingers, lips thoroughly red and kissed, chest and face both flushed bright, making his patchwork of white scars stand stark against his skin. His eyes looked hungry, but tender, so tender that she found she didn’t have words, sighing into their next kiss, loving and patient as he cupped her cheek. 

“Whatever comes next… I…” he breathed against her lips between kisses, increasingly desperate, his hands stilling on her hips, gripping her tightly. “I promise… When this is all over… You will be my wife.” 

“You … You want to…?!” she gasped, words cut off by another kiss, her hands grasping his cheeks, thumbs swiping over his cheekbones, one of his hands trailing over the inside of of her thigh, finally finding her core. 

Crying out into his mouth as his thumb began to slowly circle her clit, it was all she could do to gather her thoughts, her head falling back onto the pillows. “Xander! Xander… Ah… Yes! I want to… I...! I love you!” 

His head dropped onto her shoulder, tongue lapping at her skin, followed with teeth and lips as he slowly pressed a single finger into her. It was uncomfortable, though only for a moment, slowly rolling her hips against him, feeling the texture of the calloused hand pressing her into the sheets rubbing against her skin with each shift of her body. 

_ Husband.  _

The word rang in her head, her chest about to burst with just the thought that there might be a time they could be together, that there was a future beyond the corner waiting for them, one bright and beautiful. No more dark corridors, whispers, secret liasons that she knew she’d not be able to give up after this, after the feeling of his fingers pushing inside of her, of his lips on every part of her he could reach. 

Freedom.

“Xander!” she gasped, chanting his name, the syllables on her lips every time she rolled her hips up into his wanting touch. 

Corrin scraped her hands down his back, tagging at the waistband of his hands as his thrusting fingers curled inside of her. She couldn’t stand it, trying to pushing him closer, her need growing more and more urgent with every passing second as her stomach coiled and her skin burned for his touch. Her lips sought contact with his skin, finding his shoulder, his neck, the taste of sweat sending shivers down her spine when she thought about how it would feel to have more than just his fingers inside of her. 

“Please!” Corrin finally cried out, trying to push his trousers off of his hips to no avail. “I can’t take it anymore…” she nearly sobbed against his skin. “Please, Xander, please take me. I need to feel you. I need you so much!” 

She felt him shiver underneath her hands, inhaling sharply at the loss of his fingers as he pulled away from her completely. It took him mere moments to shed the rest of his clothing, Corrin unable to ignore the way he looked completely nude, his legs thick, his manhood obvious and hard. She had never seen a man like this before, and she felt herself grow hot… 

Not in fear, but in anticipation. 

It… Wasn’t as if she hadn’t wondered what it would feel like before. 

If she were honest with herself, she’d even thought of Xander, thought of being wrapped his his arms, of him filling her. 

She’d just never thought… 

Xander’s kiss drove away her other thoughts as he flipped them so that she straddled his hips, her hands on his chest. Beneath her, his soft curls cushioned his head, his expression so tender that it made something inside of her ache, even as she groaned at the feeling of him slowly grinding against her. 

Corrin’s breath hitched, leaning forward to kiss him, feathering her lips over his face as he grasped her hips, helping her position herself. Then, slowly, achingly, he began to push himself inside of her, head pushing past her lips as he filled her -- Thick, so thick, and she could feel her body spasming around him. It didn’t hurt, but it was unlike anything she’d ever felt, her fingers digging into his shoulders as she watched his face, his eyelids fluttering, lips parting as he made noises that only made her body quiver for him more. 

In a matter of moments that seemed to stretch on forever as Xander filled her, she was seated across his hips, his hands grasping her thighs as he panted, staring up at her with wide-eyed and earnest awe. Inside of her body, she could feel him, hot, pulsing, and hard, the idea that somehow just being with her was enough to get him like this drawing the motivation from her to slowly gyrate her body over him. Each movement sent slight shocks through her body and drew perfect noises from him, his fingers twitching against her skin like he was willing them not to move, his usually perfectly composed face candied with his passion. 

“Corrin!” he gasped, voice barely more than a whisper, helping her lift herself off of him as she braced herself against his chest. 

She faltered at first, but with each movement of her hips it grew easier and easier, her head falling to press their foreheads together just so she could hear every hitch, stutter, and pleasured groan that left his lips and feel them vibrate through his body. Slowly, they fell into a rhythm, heat building in her body until she could barely stand it, each movement of her body met with a thrust from below that made her arms tremble with the effort of supporting her own weight. She felt like her palms might slip on his sweaty chest, but she didn’t want to stop -- She couldn’t stop. 

He was so perfectly addicting, the way he looked like this.

He was so utterly hers, so completely vulnerable. 

And it made her feel something she couldn’t wholly explain, some sort of pride, to know she was the only one who could pull desperate ‘I love you’s and ‘please’s from his perfect lips. 

Brushing her nose along his jaw, she pressed a kiss beneath his ear, moving her lips to his neck where she sucked at his skin, the action drawing a single, loud, moan from him. 

In an instant she found herself on her back beneath him as he wrapped her legs around his waist, crying out in surprise and grasping for her, arms winding around his neck as he was pressed into the bed beneath her. Not once did his hips stall, in fact he seemed only to increase the pace, changing the angle so that every thrust made her vision turn white, her mind scrambling to process the bursts of overwhelming pleasure verging on shock. 

Corrin could only work on his neck again, his voice driving her nearly as mad as the way he pressed into her and drew out, one of his hands reaching between them to rub against her clit out of time with his thrusts. It was all she could do just to hold onto him, her mind growing blank as she finally reached her climax, feeling him thrust inside her even as her body tried to hold him in place, waves of heat and static heightening all her senses as everything around her exploded with sensation. 

Xander kissed her as he came, Corrin feeling his release, his body seizing and then relaxing as he slowly lowered them onto the sheets of the small mattress. For the first time, she noticed the way it creaked beneath them, shivering as the sweat on her skin cooled as much from the feeling of Xander stroking his fingers tenderly over the skin of her forearm. 

“I love you,” he said again, after a languorous moment, their limbs tangled together, the sound of his heartbeat lulling her to sleep. “I love you, Corrin. I… I know that this is selfish, but…” 

She shook her head, trying to silence him by pressing a finger to his lips, though he grasped her wrist and slowly brought her palm to his face for a kiss. Xander’s eyes met and held hers, his expression so heartbreaking that it stole the breath from her lips and and the words from her mouth, grasping his face in both hands in an attempt to ease away the pain in that expression. He leaned into the touch, his eyes closing, though he only continued to speak, his voice so quiet that the words could only be for her. 

“I want… I want only this one thing,” he swallowed thickly, “please… just let me have this one thing. I want… To stay with you, for as long as I live.” 

The words broke her heart as she kissed away the tears that brimmed in his eyes, tears she wasn’t even certain he knew were there. 

Xander held her close, his breathing slowing enough that she knew he had dozed off, and Corrin vowed to stay for as long as they both lived… Even if she knew she couldn’t stay the night. 


End file.
